The Constant that is Nature
I have been visiting the Kruger National Park in South Africa since I was a young girl. My earliest memories are of waking up in our caravan, and eagerly getting ready for the day of “game spotting”
This was, and still is a very simple approach to the days that unfold in the African bushveld – because we literally spent the time outside of the safety of the camp in our vehicles and on the hunt for all the creatures that occupy this vast expanse of natural beauty.
Only to look, and to marvel at them.
I have just visited the nature reserve again, and I remain in awe of this absolute perfection.
The majesty of the large plains of flora and fauna below the huge South African sky, with the shapes of animals cut into that scene always gets me right in the chest. It’s an energy that I have no words to adequately explain.
Still today, at my ripe age of 50, I spend the days in Kruger much the same.
It’s an early morning rise because the colours of the morning are just spectacular, and then a late return to the camp.
We time it just perfectly to drive into the gates before the camp is shut, leaving Africa’s Big Five safely out of reach of the lesser humans on the other side.
Lesser on the food chain, in any event.
But what is this strange activity, of doing this you might ask?
“i feel like a fraud”
As I progressed through this discussion, which was really highlighting some challenges that I am facing now – a big one is how I show up as a mindset coach – it felt liberating to confess that I feel like a fraud.
In a sense, liberating – but I also felt a little scared.
The fact is we all have a past.
We have people that have walked a journey with us, and when we ourselves go down a path of self-development, it is often difficult to explain how we come out on the other end.
How we have changed.
Because in that journey of change, I have found that I see things very differently now, and in that, I have started to feel things very differently and who I was is slipping away from me.
But others still know who I was – and it’s in this fact where the word “fraud” comes up in my mind.
I feel like a fraud.
And it is an emotion, that I know is untrue, but it does creep in and take hold on occassion.
it’s a pilgrimage of sorts
Vastly different to the Camino that I love so much, but in essence much the same.
Both offer you an opportunity to become untethered from the world – one in the beauty of the Spanish countryside and the other, inside the Kruger boundaries.
It’s the simplicity of the days, and I feel it the moment my car and I pass over the threshold.
The threshold separates the outside world from the one where clarity is right there in your view all the time.
I felt that same thing when I walked pilgrimage.
And yes, for me it is as much a feeling, as it is something that can be seen.
What is clarity for you, and where do you find it?
nature is ever-changing but equally as constant
Being in the Kruger National Park makes me feel secure. Even among all of the potential dangers that lurk in the thornbushes, long grasses, and gnarly old trees.
An evening in Satara camp makes this danger very clear.
Putting your head down to get a good night’s rest, you are reminded of the constant moving of nature, and still how it stays the same.
You can hear the lionesses calling to the hunting females, and the eery laughing of the hyena as they eagerly await a kill, and to hopefully share in some of the spoils.
And the bush shuffles and cracks, and life is going on, on the other side of that fence.
The blatant, clear and often savage circle of life.
But still, I feel secure.
I feel secure in nature’s purpose, in its meaning and how I fit into the grand scheme of things. Even as small as I am in that grander scheme.
But I make up a part of the whole, and just in that thought, I am wonderfully embraced with my own purpose.
My memories of my beautiful childhood come flooding back, and even though grief is never far from me, my feeling of loss perpetuates my purpose – solidifies it, and makes it burn even brighter.
I think this is the reason so many of us flock into nature – to ground ourselves in how we fit into this grand scheme, and I have no doubt that each of us do.
To witness its ever-changing face – from droughts; to floods; to death; to birth and in this change we see the constants of nature.
And in seeing the constants of nature, we then see how each of us is being constant too – ever-changing, but always reflecting our view of the world. Never ignoring the stark realities of it, but still seeing the incredible magnificence of it all.
how are you seeing the world at the moment, and the way you are seeing it, does it serve you well?
Nature gives us all an opportunity to reflect on our own good natures, to own the constraints of our personalities and realise where we need love and support to break down our barriers.
It is the most productive place to assess our relationships with one another, and even more important to see how we are in a relationship with ourselves.
To listen to the words we use.
To understand our patterns away from our regular lives, and how some of those patterns might not completely serve us.
To make shifts in our journeys and to realise that we are fundamentally in this circle of life and that this body we occupy is an earthly body, and it does indeed have a clandestine expiry date etched in the flesh.
Just like the animals living on the other side of that camp’s fence.
So, how are you in a relationship with yourself? Do feelings of regret, resentment, fear, and anger bubble to the surface?
If so, ask yourself why.
What has happened or is happening to cause these things, and then gently and kindly remind yourself of that expiry date branded on your body.
It’s never too late, nor too early to make shifts that serve you, and that serve your purpose.